Happy memories

When I was a teenager
I thought I could move
mountains and seas

When I was a teenager
I thought I could
dry your tears

For what I understood
I understood not

For what I dreamt
I realised them all

at least that was how I felt
being a teenager

I had in front of me
the dream of reciting
the dream of painting
the dream of writing
the dream of making a film
with a story so moving
that you wonder
why and why
you never thought of making one similar

Good to be a teenager
because you understood nothing
and from nothing
you created everything

( digital drawings only began in 2013 but due to various reasons I decided not to continue until a necessity of inner desire matures itself; began as someone who was interested in high tech (studied technical audio visual means in 1976 ) and I therefore found low tech reality interesting  ( such as Renassiance Florence as a physical entity which esists at this high tech age truly advanced as an idea ). As a result, I even went further by doing low tech works, such as watercolors on paper, yet done in low tech mood ( as a student who went back in time ) or even experimenting on walls, from a brief experiment on fresco painting to a secco painting using Chinese mineral pigments. What to choose and what not to choose actually is related more to an inner needs- or perhaps, due to one's ambience, one is provoked to the point of doing controversial type of works ( In Canada where abstraction was desirable, I opted for figurative , hence my visiting year in Scotland as a student., then when figurative was too much a concern , I opted for oriental and French kind of expressions, and when in Florence expressive figurative works were more in fashion, I was more interested in conceptual expressions suggested by Duchamp. And finally when I was persuaded to live in a secluded ambience in Rome and was not allowed to enjoy its medieval quality, I went back to Renaissance imput of Madonna and child, and of a figurative kind of return in images. When I was being too encouraged of the idea of poverty in the real sense of the word: with no means of support and to wear ragged clothing, I became truly interested in getting my own outfit painterly and artistically made. What others approve, I became worried., what others believe as being the only good to pursue, I question its validity by actually doing the other way in the best means possible. )

Now that it seems all those who have been persuading me in one way or another kind of stop, especially after my courage of picking the no longer usable watercolor brush, and the few colors left, to do all those memory paintings-

because at the end it is you who live your life, and its quality lies only in your very best effort of fighting the inevitable foe- the rest is no longer important.

That is why in ancient time, Chuang Zi already warned:

if the others agree with you ( in what you do or what you think ) it does not necessarily mean what you do or think is true as an intrinsic value.