memory lost, memory recovered

one day, years ago

I had a trauma

At one point I went to see a medical doctor

in the Vatican city

or near the Vatican city ( I don't remember )

He talked to me for some minutes

told me I could begin to take some kind of herbal medicine

for some months

that would relax me , he believed

I took that medication for six months

and thought I had recovered

but only years later 

did I realise

I had actually lost memory

not all of the memory

but enough to allow me not to live normally

I was no longer able to do much

Then one day, I began to be brave enough

to take the left over travelling watercolors

and began to paint

the series

self portraits in the form of a dress

with style like a teenager

slowly

scene by scene

colour by colour

dress by dress

face by face

my memory came back

my capacity returned

as a person filled with hope and love

then I began to watch old Hong Kong films

thanks to Steve Jobs

his IPad invention

scene by scene

image by image

film by film

my memory came back

with love and thankfulness

I began to draw

sketch upon sketch

lines upon lines

I traced all the film making motions

on paper

while watching the familiar old Hong Kong films

I began to remember

how to speak my own mother tongue

properly

I became well

happy

joyful

I was once again alive

so when I did manage to go to Hong Kong

to see and to relive the old Hong Kong films in real life settings

I was overjoyed

I did not realise that would happen

the last day before leaving Hong Kong

I clicked the Royal College site

thought of enrolling in a course

just to thank the watercolour inventor- the Windsor and Newton who allowed me to recover my lost memory

when they wrote

you could come over

I simply went over

and guess what

I had only wanted to do a work that would thank the Hong Kong films, seen on I Pad, in watercolour

hence, the work, now I remember,

shown there for two hours, from 6pm to 8pm, at the Battersea Campus of the Royal College of Art, London on the 12th of August 2016

It was inevitable, while doing that, Patrick the fourth brother became the protagonist of my work

My childhood life , the fun one, began with him, at the age of eight when Patrick was invited to come to my house for a party by my parents

he sat at the place where my bed was placed once, when I was a baby

so from that day onwards, I felt I was linked to him

in a funny kind of way- he, being so much older, me being an eight-year old

Behind the curtain, I kept looking at his face

that eternal face

there I saw it once again

underneath the Sistine Chapel

years later

when I was trying hard to look from beneath

Ah, Patrick

up above

is there

this time

in the form of a prophet

named

Libica

All come back in circle

my life

with my lost of memory

to my recovering of memory

through painting

through film

through Patrick my eternal star

forever shining

in the heart of a little girl

at eight

upon the ceiling of Sistine Chapel

so this work is also dedicated to Patrick

from a little girl of eight,

at heart

hence, twice I re- recorded the photos I managed to keep of Patrick in videos

thank you Patrick, thanks Patrick